Dear Dare

I always said that I would be very happy if I only had to play Football Manager and somehow get paid for playing it. I don’t know where that dream job is but I’m still looking. In the meantime, I still have this dry job behind this big desk in a small office that takes up all if my time. I bless God, it does more than pay the bills.

I read your last letter with some amusement. I’m glad that you don’t want to be in a relationship with any girl at this time. Really you shouldn’t. You’re but a teenager and I know you have the great aspiration of living totally for His glory. You know, I never had that sort of aspiration till I was 19. I am proud of your decision.

But brother, when you’re not an emotional and hormonical eunuch, how can you expect not to develop err…feelings, for someone or some ones of the opposite sex? In fact, your asking me to help with dousing such feelings is like asking me to erase Zuma Rock. How far? The Almighty God blessed us with hormones. To remove them will be to unbless you. I think you just need to put some particulars in place.

It is perfectly normal to have feelings and desires for the opposite sex. It is the way God designed our bodies and small it be forever and ever. I know you know. You like biology a lot so you can explain better to me about testosterone and all that. You cannot think this is wrong. God made it so and everything is beautiful in His sight. He won’t force you to like whatever He created; He doesn’t have low self-esteem so He knows that everything He made is perfect. You’re the one who needs to come into that revelation.

When you marry, you will understand. Oh yes, you will get married; stop squeezing your face. I know people who were disgusted with the very idea of kissing let alone living with someone for the whole of their lifetime, in the name of something called love. They thought I was insane. THEY ARE ALL MARRIED NOW! Silly people. And you’re part of that clique. Later you’ll come in with a fine girl, grinning from ear to ear and acting like you can’t walk if she’s not around. Mstchew!

Anyway, when you get married you will understand why you need all of that biological arsenal. That’s where God intended for them to be put to full use. However, the preamble comes at this your sort of age so you begin to know it’s alive and working. Boy I’m happy to know you are alive and working. Else, we would have had to pray that God resurrect every good dead work in you. I will say that the preamble helps in, you know, err, identifying some potential, you know…okay, forget it for now.

It is not evil. The misuse of a thing doesn’t make it useful. People using forks as murder weapon are the ones to blame, but that doesn’t mean forks will now come under the definition of arms and ammunition. The idea is for you to properly use your arsenal the right way. God created it for marriage, for your pleasure. That it rears its beautiful head now means you are properly created. Surely you know about puberty and all that and you know this is the period for you. So don’t be scared. It isn’t scary.

You must be in charge of your ammunition. I’m glad you have the understanding that it is not proper to engage in sexual activity now. Loving the opposite sex is not a bad thing at all. But you must control your feelings and your emotions properly as a servant of God. There is no point fuelling the flames of desire by arranging late night meetings with a fellowship sister alone or gawking at her picture at every interval. I think clearly that a particular warning in Songs of Solomon in 2:7 and 3:5 are rather apt in this case. And Paul admonishes us too, that we must each possess our arsenal (not exactly his words) in sanctification. In other words, let not the gun control the soldier. I know you catch my drift.

God loves you brother, and He trusts you to make right decisions when you follow His Word. The solution is not to cut off your genitals (why would you even think that) but to focus on Jesus so much that you will not be drawn away to satisfy legitimate desires illegitimately. The solution is never not to have the problem, but to be able to trust in the Word of God as the guide to overcoming that problem, and following the Word. In the end, you would have really shown that you are a man of Godly character.

By the way, what’s her name?


Your Uncle.


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